Blurting Out-- It Gets Better!

Life doesn't sail smooth lately. It kinda sucked. A lot.

People kept judging on MY NOSE. That's plain ridiculous! Just because my nose isn't as great as them, at least I still have a stinking nose! They make fun of me in those stupid old pictures in front of me. Hello, I still have ears and a heart! Don't you think I do?

Mom just caught me cussing in my facebook status. I know that's not nice, but can't I be mad? don't I have the right to express how I'm feeling? If I get the chance, I might not be as 'brutal' as now. She doesn't want me to go to an Islamic school so that I don't get too much pressure. She's seen people like Katy Perry and Lady Gaga who came from religious family and went to Cath school. Well, I don't get the same pressure like them, but I'm most likely equally pressured! I can't keep my anger inside; burning my throat and piling up in my brain. This is the place where I don't have to be afraid and hold back. I can write whatever I want in here. It's a democracy, shouldn't I get freedom?

School sucked more. The rules are... irrelevant to me. "Student who refuse to take part in flag ceremony/assembly gets 5 minus points." some students have a very logical reason for their refusal. Like, a student with self-esteem issue gets forced to lead the assembly while some 'too-cool-for-school' makes major fun of him. The guy refuses and gets 5 points plus a bad reputation for 'disrespecting' teacher. That's HIS pride that's on the line! He is going to risk his life and psychology health? I don't think that's a good idea. Change is good. But, not skipping steps and make a huge one. Take it one step at a time. No need to rush. Whoa, I didn't mean to quote Jordin Sparks on the second sentence.

There were times when I want to scream a curse but right now... no need to. I spilled what I felt. It felt a whole lot better. I'm a great person with many potentials. I have many good friends. People likes me. So what? My family's not that supportive, but I know that my parents are, deep inside. Someday, they'll stop making fun of me. Someday, they'll no longer saying bull about how useless I am. I am the director of my own life. I don't care about what people think of me. I'm an older girl who was born only 12 years ago. Ironic. But I won't let it get to me. Not a chance.

Songs of the entry are Save The Day by David Archuleta, Details In The Fabric by Jason Mraz ft. James Morrison, Make Some Noise by Miley Cyrus, I Don't Care by Fall Out Boy, and Fuck You by Lily Allen.