It's Me (Attempted To) Sing!

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Walk Away

Pacing through a cold empty street
Each step takes me further away from here
Leaving you on the doorstep, standing still
While the sound of footsteps fade as I leave

There ain't no spark between us
Just fire and ice
Who never tire a good fight
Although we're dying inside

(Refrains:)
We've hurt each other so many times
That we might actually lost our minds
We've been trying to make it work
But how do we fix something that’s already broken?
I just can't take it anymoreThere's nothing left to fight for
So, please don't beg me to stay
And just let me walk away

We were young and naïve
A couple of teenagers in love
Everything seemed so good and easy
But, in the end, it didn't turn out to be

Our relationship has fallen apart
Along with the torn-up pictures and our shattered hearts
And now, here I am, wondering
If what I did was wrong or right

(Refrains)

Our relationship has fallen apart
Along with the torn-up pictures and our shattered hearts

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Being "Switzerland"

Being neutral is not easy. It's not easy to be on one side when you actually wanna hear the story from both sides. It's not easy to protect yourself from the other side's influences without being an ignorant. I'm not saying this as a smart-ass. I'm saying this because that's exactly what I'm going through right now.

I'm an all-or-nothing kind of person. I'm very investigative and all about research. I've always been. I don't wanna judge something based on "he said, she said". I look for information and try to find out the truth. And it's endangering my moral roots and ideology sometimes.

My best friend is totally an anti-America. Me... not really. I do have dreams of going to Yale for college and live in Manhattan and all that stuff. But, having a conversation about it earlier makes me realize how deep I'm in right now. I actually feel sorry for myself. Pathetic!

I've changed. A lot. And although being open-minded has taught me many valuable lessons, I think it's time to take this down a notch.

On a second thought, I don't think I want to be Switzerland. I want to be a modern person who still knows where she's from and what she's made of. I know it's not easy but I'll learn. I know I have it in me, I just have trouble finding it. And with my God, I know I can.

Friday, July 16, 2010

ECLIPSE :D

hey, guys! what's the craic? It's been a really long time since I updated. I actually checked this place out a couple times, I was just too lazy writing something lol. I've been really unproductive during this holiday. I didn't write one chapter, not one song, nothing.

anyways, Eclipse was out and I saw it twice (at the same movie theater lol). It was AWESOME! This is where they actually reached my expectations. The looks, the storyline, the actors, Jacob... everything. This is the point where, I think, the Cullen clan look 'vampire' enough. When I first saw Twilight, all I thought about them was "They're not vampires; they're just a group of weirdly pale people who are played by beautiful people". But now, this movie, I could actually see the vampire in them.

Speaking of vampires, there's a new hottie in town! Yep, I'm talking about Xavier Samuel aka Riley Biers. He's really hot, he kind of reminds me of an actor in old silent movies. Now that is what I call a stone-cold, drop dead gorgeous vampire!

The wolves are, needless to say, super-hot! Especially Taylor. I literally held my breath to not squeal inside the theater. For real. I totally agree with Mark, you could fry eggs on Taylor's abs haha

I'm on Team Jacob. I've always been. And not just because I'm on Team Jacob, but I think Bella and Jacob's story is more... I don't know, interesting. And heartbreaking. It's a really sad piece.

Weird, but that actually made me dislike Bella. Not because she picked Edward over Jacob, but... how desperate she is for him. And how she's willing to throw everything away for one guy. Alright, not just any guy; Edward Cullen. But, like I said, being too needy is not healthy. I actually agree with Rosalie on this one.

Here's the thing. If Bella chooses Edward, she'd have to give up on everyone and everything in her life. But with Jacob, she wouldn't have to change or give up a thing. Like, would you let 1000 people die for 1 man? or would you let go of 1 man for 1000?

But, the story went the other way, so... Too bad.

It's so predictable! These love stories. An average girl with crappy life, meets a perfect guy, falls in love, then one day he leaves her, they're both devastated, they get back together, they get married, roll credits. What if when he left, Bella eventually moved on and fell in love with Jacob? or that some mysterious guy showed up in her life and took her breath away?

But, overall, the movie was awesome :) Best quote in the whole movie is... "Let's face it. I am hotter than you." by Jacob. I was like, "hell yeah!" when he said that lol

Song of the entry is "Jacob's Theme" by Howard Shore. It's a track from the orchestral score, and I freakin' love it!



Until the next time ;)





Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Veinticuatro

"Veinticuatro". According to the dictionary --or, more likely, Google translator-, it means "Twenty Four". We are the 24th class in our middle school. 24 is us.

like any other school, we have cliques and social circles. the nerds, the 'okay' kids, the cool kids, the skanks, the jocks, the weirdos, the teacher's pets... you name it. As much as I hate to admit it, it's true. those 'sides' DO exist. Some of the kids are neutral --they're good friends with ppl from different circles and not care about the social system-; some are 50-50 --they're a little judgmental and have stereotypes-; some are 'exclusive' --they got a "little world of their own", and ignores the people outside it-; and some are just... introverted --they just don't like to socialize.

Yesterday was our farewell party. a bunch of my classmates put together a short documentary about all of us. They did a great job, it was really nice. but... it's such a shame. It's not about ALL of us. It's just about a BUNCH of us. Too bad, because we are not the only ones in Veinticuatro. there are a lot of important people and important moments that weren't caught on tape. though, once again, good job :)

but, memory lives on. We don't need pictures or videos or anything to remember those priceless moments. Pictures are worth a thousand words, and words would not describe those moments. It's up to you on how would you like to remember those times. it's three years worth to remember :)

I've had a lot of amazing adventures during my three-years here, and I want to thank you for that. Thank you for being there for me when no one else wasn't. Thank you for listening to my problems. Thank you for opening my eyes and make me realize and step out of my perfect little world. Thank you for everything.

It breaks my heart to walk separate ways with you guys. But we have our own lives, we gotta move on.

I really hope you guys are still a part of my life no matter what.

I love you guys :')




P.S.: I don't believe in goodbye's. Just 'see you later's

P.S.S.: Song of the entry is "Us Against The World" by Westlife ;)

Saturday, May 8, 2010

National Exams Results. aaaaah!

Hey y'all! So the results were finally out yesterday. I only got the average of 8.3, so... I still haven't decided which high school I'm going to. At first I was really bummed and disappointed that I cried. Well, my parents are okay with that. But I'm not. Wasn't, at least. I wanted to get to 34HS, but my score's not enough. Well, it might be enough --This year's national average plummeted!- but I'd have to get on the second period. So, I might as well have some backup plans. I was thinking, maybe 3 or 6. They're both grrrrreat schools :)

Anyways, it's still a success for me and my friends, so it's worth celebrating. Today we did :) Not quite a bang or anything, but we had fun. In fact, that was impromptu. Nabilla, Raya, Risti, Ceko and I were just checking out yearbook pics at the advertising agency. Then we got really hungry, so we went to the mall. Ceko really insisted to catch 'Iron Man 2', but the movie was closed, what were we supposed to do? lol. Anyways, then he came up with a brilliant idea. "Let's go for a karaoke!" :D

At first we were a little hesitant. But, in the end, we did went to the karaoke place. We sung one crappy local song, and then our personal favorites like Thunder, Love Story, My Life Would Suck Without You, Baby, Just Dance, More Than Words, If I Let You Go, Fix You, Ordinary People... None of us could sing, so it don't matter! We sang off-key, so what? haha

I had a lot of fun today. Sometimes good things just come unexpectedly, right? I'm still bummed at some point, cuz some of my friends aced it and here I am with tight score, and the fact that I might have to say goodbye to 34. I reaaaally want to get there so badly. But, I guess, you can't always get what you want. I get what I need ;)

I'm currently listening to "Hey Whatever" by Westlife, I think that suits the situation right now. I've been listening to Westlife a lot lately --It's been freakishly frequent over the past few weeks lol-, reminiscing the good ol' days. I like their upbeat songs, it's uplifting and lightens up my mood. I forgot how good they are for all these years... It's been, like, 7 years! And I just got the fever again. haha

Well, I think that's it for now. I'll try to write more often.


Toodles! ;)




P.S.: I wonder how Jake feels about my day today. I mean, that's his best friend over there. Don't take this the wrong way, though. I mean, I like Ceko, but not in that way --Not exactly boyfriend material lol. Eww- but... ya never know. Last time I checked, this whole thing with his buddy and me was a little sensitive --A hint of jealousy, obviously! lol-. Wonder if he still got that.... lol

Saturday, April 17, 2010

End Of One, Another Begins

April 15th 2010. After going a bit of a rough patch, I decided to call it quits with Jake. He doesn't understand me anymore, and he acts like "I had to have you or I won't be happy". That might sound sweet for some people, but not me. You should want the person you're in love, but you shouldn't need them. He said he's not gonna get all 'lovey-dovey' 'cuz he still loves me and he wants to focus on school. I could only responds with a sour smile and an 'if-you-only-knew' look.

He ain't seen nothing yet! He's a small-town boy, he's only 15!!! He doesn't know anything about life or love. And maybe neither do I. But, I do know something; adventures, love, and life are not the things you can control. The world is a huge round place and it revolves around in a huge circle. Some things just come unexpectedly.

It's tragic. I didn't know that someone like him could be that naive! Oh well. It's for his own good anyway. I'm a very independent person when it comes to boys. I don't think I'm ready for love yet. Not that kind of love yet. I do enjoy little schoolgirl crushes and dates, but he seems so serious about our relationship. Geez, we're teenagers, damn it! It's not like we're getting married tomorrow or anything. Ugh.

As much as I hated breaking up with him, this would be the best for us. I couldn't stand any more second and any more stress from that relationship, and him? Let's just say he got a chance for himself to take a good look around and realize that LIFE ISN'T AS SIMPLE AS IT MAY SEEMED. And that he's only a human being, and he has no control of the universe he lives in.

And for the record, I'm not brooding and crying myself to sleep. I figured that everything happens for a reason, so... this must be a good thing. I think. If not? Oh well. I'm single, I'm young. I have lots of friends. I'll just be 'Barney Stinson' awesome! We'll see. lol


December 20th 2009 - April 15th 2010




P.S.: I couldn't find a song that really fit this situation. But I'm currently writing a song about this as a birthday gift to him (Haven't even got the chance to actually buy the gift) and I'm gonna post the lyrics as soon I finished them. Although... Kelly Clarkson's "Already Gone" sounds good, too ;)

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Cousin Amanda's Wedding

I attended my cousin Amanda's wedding last Saturday :) it was a fairytale... I am soooo officially in love with weddings. Well, I've always been in love with weddings. I don't know if it's the great venue, the open bar, or the beautiful bride. Or the fact that I've seen '27 Dresses' and 'Bride Wars' wayyyyyy too many times. LOL!

Anyway, back to Amanda's wedding. It was located in Building 165 near Citos, both the ceremony and the reception. The ceremony was sweet. Amanda looked really beautiful and Remy (The groom) looked neat, though may I say the color of their clothes were a little pale. I kept it low profile and wore a white maxi dress with a blue scarf and a pair of ivory wedges. Oh, and roses on my hair! haha. I also took a pic with Raka from Vierra, 'cuz he is actually Remy's little brother. He is surprisingly... not so tall. Or was it the wedges I wore? lol

After the ceremony, we had about two hours to get ready for the reception. I changed into the brown 'satin-and-brocade' dress and had a family photo op. The reception began with the bride and groom along with their family entering the venue. This is my favorite part.

From the front: Amanda and Remy, then Big Momma with Aunt Alita, Uncle Toro and Remy's dad, Ardo and Raka, Ican and Emil, me and Nadia, my mom and dad, aaaand a bunch of other people behind us. The family entered the room with Imel's Ten2Five singing "Hanya Untukmu". I was like, "Holy shiiiiiit! Raka Vierra and now Ten2Five? Damn!" and then I met up with cousins. Then Tisa and I went to explore the foods (Which is DE-LICIOUS!) until... OMG! It's Kevin Aprillio! When I saw him, I thought, "I think the whole member of Vierra is here. And I think they're gonna perform," and I was right.

I saw Widy and came up to her for a picture. Then a few minutes later, they performed on the beautiful little stage. Only three songs. The first one was I don't know what it's called but it was good, then "Rasa Ini", and lastly "Bersamamu". I admit that the band is actually pretty good. BUT THE VOCALIST RUINS IT ALL! Seriously. She can't sing that kind of music. She's better off singing screamo, like seriously. Though she did look pretty, and tall back there.

Party's over and I took some roses at the entrance. Beautiful white and pink roses :)

Venue: Fantastic. Music: Superb. Food: Four thumbs up. Decorations: Awesome. Man, I'd love to have a wedding like that one day... only I want it to be either a garden party, the top of a Manhattan building or the beach :)


Song of the entry is "Today Was A Fairytale" by Taylor Swift.

It's gonna be a while until my next update since I got National Exams in five days, and I'm saying goodbye to my beloved laptop until then lol. So... until the next time,




XOXO

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Juggling!

Ehmagawdddd! At this time of the year, I am STILL loaded with stuff other than the four main subjects! I have yearbook meetings, honors class, tons of homework, a grrrrrreat social life, a boyfriend and... I think that's it.

Seriously, I am 13 years old, damn it! I am the youngest student in class, and... I'm carrying more pressure than the other kids are. When everyone's thinking, focusing, and worrying about their NE scores, I'm thinking about my studying hours at home, the yearbook meetings along with its subs, the high school I want to go to, the papers and homework and essays that I have to do once I get home, my friends, Jake, my parents.... Sometimes I just want to sleep all day. It's ironic.

As much as I enjoy doing some of those stuff, it gets pretty tiring. Especially when it's like 9pm, and you feel like you're reaaaally exhausted that you don't even have the strength to care. And when the alarm rings at butt-crack of dawn, you're not fully recharged yet! and that REAAAAALLY SUCKS!!!

oh, and it gets worse when someone pisses you off. On my case, it's mostly my parents. Sometimes I wish they would just shut the fuck up!

I'm currently real pissed at them, so... I'll get off now. Song of the entry is... Glee - Defying Gravity.



xoxoxo

Sunday, February 21, 2010

F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

To be honest, at first, I wasn't so happy that I was assigned to IX-A. There were a bunch of bad boys and geeks and some real annoying people. During the first few months, my friends and I were kind of keeping it to ourselves and stay inside our social circle.

But then, the clock keeps on ticking. We got to know everyone better. Faizah turns out to be the sweetest person ever. Nofal turns out to be THE MOST HILARIOUS person. Senna is actually a real gentleman. Adi and Dimas turns out to be great companies to have fun and get crazy with. We're like one big, happy family. (Note.: There are only TWO people I dislike in class; F and C. You know who they are.)

But, too bad... We're gonna graduate in a blink of an eye and we'll go our separate ways.

Love you guys forever <3

Friday, January 8, 2010

My "Daring" School Essay

My Indonesian teacher gave the 9th graders a task to create an essay about anything for, at least, 10 pages. Oh well, since he said anything, I assume he means anything. At first, I was thinking maybe... social networking sites and teenagers nowadays. But I figure, it's really common for teens to write about social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter and how it affects their lives. So, I decided to write about Freemasonry & Illuminati.

I know, it's a bit of a heavy reading for someone my age. But, I'll bet no one's ever written an essay about this before (at my school, at least) and this would get me promising scores. And I hope the essay would be a 'wake-up call' for everyone who reads it. A lot of people has been blinded and manipulated by them -Including us. I finally knew it, and it's time for the rest of you to know it, too.

I have a few things I'd like to discuss (and argue) from the topic I've chosen for my essay. Some of them are;

The domination of Masons and Illuminatus, everywhere. In case you don't know, Illuminati is a secret society founded in 1700's whose goal is to 'rule the world'. The Illuminati and Freemason are scattered everywhere, from the U.S. and Israel government, the media (FOX, CNN, CBS, CNN, etc.), CIA, United Nations, to NASA.

For example, the Israel-Palestine conflict. The feud has been going since the '20s, with all the efforts that the UN did, and there's still no way out. Why? Let me break it down for you. UN was founded by Franklin D. Roosevelt and Winston Churchill, who were both Masons. And, as I've mentioned before, the Masons dominate the UN which practically makes them sides with Israel. Though, most of the European countries remain neutral, abstaining the ongoing condemnation of Israel and supporting the foundation of Palestinian state. But still, they are the one who call the shots.

Another example, just one other. The New World Order. NWO is a term that many politicians use from time to time that refers to a global conspiracy by a group of powerful and influencial people who wants to eventually rule the world. In order to reach their 'main goal', they're doing a propaganda. Through movies. Don't believe it? Keep reading.

"2012" is a form of their propaganda. They would make this movie, scare tons of people, and then manipulate and control them once they're under the illusion. And, they're gonna make themself look like the hero in the story. They would "take the people under their wings and battle against it" like the movie "Independence Day", where the humans unite to fight aliens under United States' commands. What makes it more obvious for me is that both of the movie scripts are written by the same person, Roland Emmerich. Plus, you know who's doing the main soundtrack for 2012? That's right, Adam Lambert. And he is... a Jewish. A little too made-up for a coincidence, don't you think?

I will upload my essay once I get it done. Just wish me lots of luck, will ya?


XOXO


Tuesday, January 5, 2010

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

Happy New Year, everybodyyyyy! haha. Hope you guys all had a great time during New Year's Eve, and may this year be a good one for everyone ;)

My New Year's Eve celebration is rather... private, but, still, it's a blast! There were me, Risti, Dinda, Nila, and Raya. Our location was Risti's house. In her room, mostly. We watched DVDs, played with the fireworks, makeover, and had a McDonald delivery at 3am (Don't ask lol). It was A LOT of fun!


Anyways, my new year resolutions are;
  • Acing all the school tests and got into 34 High. HELL YEAH!!!
  • Be a better person. For people and the environment around me.
  • Able to earn money for Detroit at the end of the school year (Fingers crossed!)
  • Be more organized.
  • Finish writing 'Twisted Fairytale'
  • Write at least 15 songs along with the music
  • Post those songs on YouTube and gain tons of followers
  • Stop being different versions of me and start being just me (Oh well, I can't make everyone happy!)
  • Get one thing I wrote published on a magazine :):):)

The clock keeps on ticking. By the time we realized, we're already counting down to 2011, 2012, 2013... So, the song of the entry is "Live Like We're Dying" by Kris Allen. I've been playing that song on loop. I love it! And it's so meaningful, especially early at the year. Until the next time,


xoxoxoxoxo